Sounds Like a Plan

Hey all, quick Monday post here.  Last week I talked about wanting to ramp up my workouts and renew my commitment to getting in fighting shape.  Well, this week I decided to try something new to accomplish that goal: I planned out my entire week, Monday through Friday, including when I was going to work out, write, train, and eat.  I also made a more detailed plan for my grocery shopping, and I cooked more food ahead of time so that I'd be prepared for when I got home at 9pm STARVING and ready to chew my own arm off.  I've always been a planner and list maker, but this just took it to another level.  I mean, I even scheduled in showers. Later on this week I'll report back on how I did with following the plan, and how it made me feel!

What kind of person are you?  A super planner?  A fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants person?  When do you feel like you get more accomplished?

My First Guest Post and March Goals

Hey guys! So although I’ve been a slacka over here, I have been doing SOME writing! Check out Chandra’s Shenanigans for a guest post from yours truly (first one!) on how I made the transition from working at a desk to spending my days in the gym. I know I kind of already wrote about it here, but it was fitting to write about it over there because she did the same thing! Granted, she was a little smarter about it, transitioning slowly, and not just saying ‘Eff you, corporate desk job’ and quitting completely, but still.

Anyway, another thing I almost completely forgot about is making March goals! Luckily Rachel over at Shedding It reminded me. (Forgetting three months into the year…good job, Heather.) I honestly don’t know how I did on February’s goals, because the month was crazy, but I’m going to try to make some more for March and actually pay attention to them. So here we go!

1) Get more sleep: Seriously, guys, this one is a huge problem. Why is it that I cannot get a handle on it? I need suggestions in a big way! HELP! SOS! Seriously, give me some tips, because I haven’t been able to figure this one out. Shooting for seven hours of sleep for only 3 nights this month. Baby steps? I don’t know…help!

2) Start journaling my food again: I’ve been pretty good about knowing what I’ve eaten during the day, but I could buckle down a little bit more. I’ve got some big goals –athletic and otherwise – so I need to make sure I’m in tip top shape, and I think this will really help.

3) Put money aside every week: With this job, I won’t lie, I have had to panic at the end of the month more than once when it comes to my finances. So, I need to commit to putting at least $20 (maybe $50…still deciding) away at the end of every week. I used to do this all the time, and it was great because I was starting this little nest egg, and because I put it away immediately when I got paid, I never even noticed that I didn’t have it. I need to save up for some big stuff (namely a new laptop to replace this dinosaur and a bike for the Tri), so this should help.

4) Recommit to my workouts and ramp them up: I did an awesome job of cranking up the intensity of my workouts in February, and it showed, but at the end of the month, I fell off a little. Even though it was only skipping one or two workouts, I still felt it. So for March, I want to renew my commitment and even add in a cardio session or two to my week. I want to get stronger, faster, leaner, and all-around more athletic.

What are your goals for this month?  Did you already forget about them like I did?  (Oops!) Tell me what you want to accomplish this month!

Link Love and In Response to Anonymous #2

I am so so sorry I've neglected the blog, but this week has been crazy!  This was the last week of the month, meaning I was working 13 to 15 hour days and didn't even have time to breathe, let alone blog.  Anyway, for now, I want to leave you with a few awesome links that really hit home with me this week.  If you aren't already following these bloggers, I suggest you check them out!

First up, Gena from Choosing Raw wrote an amazing essay on embracing our appetites... for everything.  As a feminist and a woman, I can totally relate to this.  For a major chunk of my life, I was so focused on being the 'good girl' or the 'skinny girl' that I ignored everything and anything I was craving.  This essay really brings to light the fact that many of us do this all the time.  

Next, my good friend Rachel from Shedding It & Getting It wrote a few awesome posts related to the same idea.  Her first one about going with her cravings and deciding not to justify to herself or anyone else what she wanted was so inspiring that I just had to smile.  She also wrote one a few days ago about "Your Unruly Appetite" that was inspired by Gena's post.  My favorite line? "Sometimes a girl needs to eat. And get laid. It’s biology, people — not a big f****** deal." (Man, my parents are going to love that one...Hi, Mom!).

Another blogger, Kristin from Cook, Bake, and Nibble, talked about her experiences with disordered eating and denying herself as well.  Since it was NEDAwareness week, she talked about her struggles with body image and food.  I love the honesty of all of these ladies this week!

And one last thing before I go, I really wanted to address a comment left on my last post 'Are Eating Disorders Contagious?'  The second anonymous comment had this to say: "It sounds like you have an eating disorder and have had it since college. That's what therapy is for. I don't know if you can begin to get healthy until you face your demons and not project them on to your surroundings. I hope you take the steps to get help." While I appreciate the honesty, and I think everyone has a right to state his or her opinion, I did want to discuss this one.  First of all, when I state my opinion in this way, I at least own up to it.  I wish "Anonymous #2" had done the same. 

However, I would like to say to this commenter (and everyone else reading) that I have never denied having an eating disorder in college.  I had major control issues, and what I was doing was not healthy.  And I did get help.  Therapy got me my sanity back, and I give a ton of credit to the counselor who got me through so much at UMich.  And now, for the first time in a long time, I'm not counting calories and I'm not freaking out over every minute of cardio I miss or about every morsel of food that goes into my mouth.  The point of this post was to say that I am finally sane, but I know I still need to be careful because recovery doesn't happen overnight.  I am not blaming anyone at work for any residual issues I have, just stating that I need to watch myself in that kind of environment so that I can take preventative measures to keep myself from going back to that darker place.  In the same way that someone might load up on vitamin C to keep from catching a cold that's going around, I am forcing myself to notice what everyone is doing so that I don't lose what I've fought so hard to get back -- my health and my sanity.  I'm not saying I don't still have a ways to go, but please belive that I am healthier and I am not 'projecting my demons' onto the amazing people with whom I work.     

To everyone else who left comments, thank you!  Your support and the fact that you read means the world to me!  And you know what, thank you to Anon #2 as well, because it's important to address these things, and you gave me the opportunity to do so.

Hope everyone is having a fab weekend!  What you think of the links posted?  How do you feel about cravings and trying to control our appetites?  And for all of you bloggers or writers out there, how do you address the less-than-positive comments?  Do you address them at all?         

Are Eating Disorders Contagious?

Lately at work, everyone has been sick! We all have colds right now, and it probably doesn’t help that we all hang out with each other for 14 hours at a time on very little sleep at a super germy gym. We’re totally passing it back and forth to one another.

At the same time, a lot of us here are working towards certain fitness goals and training for sports or competitions, especially with summer coming up. Being trainers, we’re all pretty committed to it, but I’m starting to get a little hyperaware of what I’m doing, how much I’m training, and what I’m eating. While I like the discipline I’m getting back, I’m also getting a little nervous about how much I’m starting to think about my training and my diet. Because the guys are constantly talking about their food and calories and how much weight they need to cut and how if they don’t puke they aren’t working out hard enough, I’ve caught myself thinking about these same things. A lot.

The thing is, I really don’t want to. Yes, I want to be healthy and make conscious choices about my food and workouts, but I don’t want it to escalate to obsession. Because I’ve been there before, and I have no desire to let being a certain weight or size completely run my life again. In college, I was so focused on keeping my weight down (at a weight that was far too low for me, in fact), that I planned out every little thing I put in my mouth (planning isn’t bad, but the level to which I did it was ridiculous), and I ended up putting so much stress on my body with exercise that my period stopped.

So I think you can understand why getting anywhere near that territory again scares me. Before, I was influenced by other people too. All of my friends being fixated on their weight and food put in my head that I should be too. I sort of ‘caught’ disordered eating habits from the women around me (and maybe society as a whole, but that’s another post). Here it’s a bunch of guys with “athletic goals,” so no one says they have eating disorders. They admire each others’ commitment, even though sometimes it clearly is disordered behavior.

Before, when I lived with all girls in the dorms and in the sorority house, it was actually a similar situation. We talked about food and calories allll the time, and girls were always giving each other tips or asking questions on how to cut calories and fill up on the smallest amount. The girls that could eat the least seemed to have a whole lot of self control and received praise, but I think we all knew it wasn’t healthy. I happened to be one of those girls for most of college. I ate “super healthy” all the time – which actually meant that I stayed away from sweets, loaded up on veggies to stay full, and ate the least amount of calories possible while running every day. But there was also a backlash from that, with my house mom telling me I looked a little too skinny and someone starting a rumor that I didn't eat dinner at the house some nights because I didn't want people knowing how little I actually ate (for the record, I had to work during the little half hour window they gave us for dinner at the house.)  Anyway, at one point I was living on 700-1000 calories a day (unless I drank, then it was just a little more – that’s what we call “drunkorexia,” folks), running 6-7 miles daily, and lifting a few times a week. I’m shocked I never passed out, honestly. Anyway, I convinced myself that I was just really disciplined, when in fact, I was really obsessed and had major control issues.

I do want to keep up this discipline and renewed commitment to feeling like an athlete again, but I don’t want to drive myself crazy with it as I did in the past. I already caught a cold from the guys I work with, but I’d like to avoid catching anything more serious.

What do you all think? Can you ‘catch’ an eating disorder or disordered eating from someone else? Or do you think some people are actually predisposed to EDs? Do other people influence your food and exercise choices? I really want to know how you feel about this topic, so spill!

Trying New Things: Yoplait Greek Yogurt

The other day, I was picking up some essentials at the grocery store when I spotted a new Greek yogurt made by Yoplait. I’m not going to lie, I got super excited when I saw this, especially because it’s almost a dollar cheaper than my beloved Fage! I am addicted to that stuff, but it can put a dent in your wallet, especially when you forget to go grocery shopping and have to shop at the little market by your house that charges an arm and a leg for everything. I was a tiny bit skeptical of Yoplait’s version, but decided to give it a try. Here are the details: It claims it has 2x the protein of leading yogurt (true), and it has 100 calories, 14 grams of protein, and 0 grams of fat. Not bad!

I opened it yesterday morning after my two early appointments, looking for a dose of protein. And, honestly…all I can say is, “UGH!” But I will admit that I ate it anyway because I didn’t have anything else, and I’m cheap like that. I also thought, HEY, I never try new stuff so this could be an awesome post! A review! I’m such a hip blogger now! (I sound like my mom. Apparently, I’m not up the lingo these days.)

Anyway, I got the plain version because I actually really like plain yogurt – Greek or regular – but this was just not good. It tasted like plain yogurt does when you accidentally let it sit out for an hour and it’s almost room temperature. Except I had just taken this out of the fridge and it was still chilled. Bleh. It actually tasted like it had gone bad or something, so I even checked the expiration date to make sure. Nope, March 20, 2010. It was just that gross. It was weird in a tangy way that was off even for plain yogurt. So if you don’t like plain in the first place, this might make you vom a little. The texture wasn’t terrible, but there was something weirdly chalky about the coating it left behind along with the aftertaste. Yoplait, your claim that it has a ‘unique, thick and creamy texture’ is only accurate on the ‘unique’ part.

So maybe I’m spoiled, and I like the good stuff, but I’m still telling you not to waste your money on this. It might be cheaper, but that’s because it’s kind of disgusting. As with most things in life, friends, you get what you pay for. I am willing to give other Greek yogurts a try, but my heart still belongs to Fage 2%, even if it is the most expensive. I’ll even do Chobani or Trader Joe’s brand if they’re available. But Yoplait… never again…

Have you tried any fun (or gross) new foods lately? What did you think? Any recommendations for me?

100-Calorie Scams

Even toothpastefordinner.com knows: Just because it's low-cal doesn't mean it's good for you!

I recently saw an ad featuring Venus and Serena Williams for Nabisco’s 100-Calorie Packs on Glamour.com. Now, I truly love Glamour for its mainly positive message to women, and I think the Williams sisters are pretty badass for their complete domination of tennis, but I have a major problem with the magazine and the sisters promoting a nutritionally void snack that uses “Diet Like a Diva” as its slogan.

First of all, Glamour has been running all sorts of articles about what eating disorders will do to your body and how eating wholesome foods is the way to go when it comes to losing weight or just staying healthy. They’ve also got the Body by Glamour plan, which, again, promotes eating healthy foods with redeeming nutritional qualities. It’s not supposed to be a ‘diet,’ but a plan with plenty of smart takeaways that will help you make permanent lifestyle changes. So it’s understandable that I take issue with the mag for pimping packaged products with the lowest amount of calories possible, right?

Additionally, the fact that the Williams sisters are the faces of this campaign really irks me. I honestly do not think that these athletes are munching on 100-calorie packs all day to keep themselves in shape. To compete like they do, I’m pretty sure they’re eating a wholesome diet full of lean protein, whole grains, and lots of produce. Sure, maybe they’ve tested the products they’re pretending to eat in the ads, but really? Do you believe that the million-time Wimbledon champs are refueling with Wheat Thins substitutes?

To be honest, I’m rarely one of those “everything in moderation” people (still working on it), and in my calorie-obsessed college days I will admit that I totally fell for this idea, but I simply can’t justify it anymore. I do understand that everyone needs a treat sometimes, but why not promote the idea that we can indulge just a little bit every now and then with something a little closer to the real thing? Personally, a little baggie of imitation cocoa-flavored wafers does not nix my chocolate craving. But you know what does? Actual chocolate (the darker the better in my case). And if I have a small enough piece, it’s going to be about 100 calories (give or take) as well, so why would I waste calories and money on little baggies (not so eco-friendly either there, Nabisco) of satisfaction-free chemically-laden ‘food’?

Anyway, I want to know what YOU have to say about this. Have you seen these ads? What do you think of them? How do you feel about Venus and Serena as well as Glamour promoting the products? What do you think of the 100-cal marketing scheme in general?

Pay Attention! (To Your Body, That Is)

Not entirely relevant, but toothpastefordinner.com kills me every time.

So I’ve had a few requests to address emotional eating, but it’s a pretty big (and sometimes loaded) topic, so I want to give it a little more thought before I talk about it. In the meantime, here’s a tip to help you work on eating mindfully.

I recently received an email from first30days.com (really cool site, btw!) with a genius way to make you a little more conscious about your food choices. It seems so obvious, but they way they put it just made the light bulb go off above my head. Instead of thinking of how good something is going to taste or feel right now, think about how you’ll feel and how it will affect you in three hours. When they put it like that, all I could think was, ‘Um, duh.’ A huge meal always makes me feel comatose after 3 hours. And too much sugar never fails to give me a headache and make me nauseous long after the taste is gone.

When I read the email I realized I had been doing just that lately. For a while there I was not tuning in so well to my body and was rushing around grabbing whatever – and some of it wasn’t the most nutritious stuff out there. It wasn’t really messing with my weight or anything, but it certainly didn’t make me feel good. So lately I’ve been thinking about how the things I’m putting into my body will affect my entire body – not only three hours from now, but three days, and even three months from now. Will a heavier meal later at night mess with my sleep or leave me waking up uncomfortable the next morning? If I’m starving when I get home after a 14-hour workday, should I grab whatever or actually take a breath and plate a balanced meal with lots of veggies? Will whole foods most likely satisfy me more and give me more energy in the long run than processed bars and shakes?

Stopping to think for a minute about how I’ll react to what I’m eating has really boosted my energy and my mood – this week especially. I’ve felt more productive, getting up early hasn’t been as much of a struggle, and I’ve had six (yeah, SIX!) pretty kickass workouts this week alone! Even waking up at 7am this morning (I don’t DO early Saturdays) was pretty easy! And I definitely won’t complain about feeling better in my clothes.

I want to know what YOU think of this idea. Are you generally good at eating mindfully? Do you have to work at it? Have you been working on it? How does it make you feel when you make conscious choices regarding your food? And for all of you pros out there, got any tips for those making an effort to eat mindfully?

Bad Reception

So... confession. Lately I haven't been perfectly tuned in to what my body needs or how I'm feeling. I've been so busy and so tired that I've been less than diligent about my health. My workouts have not been completely consistent and my eating hasn't been anywhere near what it should be. I know that keeping up a routine always improves the way I feel, but I've been slipping lately. My food hasn't been completely whole and healthy (packing enough healthy food for a 14-hour day at the gym is hard!), and I'm working on a teeny budget. And I haven't been doing what I need to do to keep my sanity. I haven't been writing and reading as much, so I've felt a little less creative (and a little dumber! I won't lie). Plus, my knees have been killing me for some reason, so the running mileage has decreased and the lower body strength training has been almost null. On a positive note, I have taken up swimming again in lieu of pounding the pavement (or the treadmill), and it's been a really good change of pace.

Anyway, I guess it's time to refresh and find the right station again so I can keep tuning into my health. I need to set a good example as a trainer, and most importantly, I just need to feel good!

I'm Full of Artificial Sweetener

Ten points for whoever can name that song. (which really shouldn't be hard, especially if you know me)

So.

I've been doing a lot of thinking about this whole hormonal imbalance idea. I already know my hormones are a bit wacky, and I've been doing a lot of reading about fixing your hormones on your own by living clean --especially eating clean. So I've decided I should clean up my diet. Now it's not like I am a regular at McDonald's, but I know I eat some things that are so not good for me that it's not even funny. I want to get rid of the icky stuff to see if I can a) fix my crazy hormones and maybe even my moods (omg, winter in Chicago did NOT help) and b) drop some lbs that I have not been happy about carrying around for the past year.

And I know I should want to eat clean, simple, whole foods for the fact that it's good for me (and the environment!) alone. Buuuut, I'm a girl. And a girl that is used to being thin and fit, so the weight thing is going to be an issue that I will try to tackle as well. Because, you see, I have been trying to get back in shape. I really have. I've even gone down a size... but it took me MONTHS. I know my desk job isn't helping, but I spend a fair amount of time at the gym and spinach and I are practically BFFs these days. I should be losing at a slow, healthy pace, no? Well, no, I'm not. I'm hardly losing at all. I eat mindfully and make sure it's mostly healthy foods. I count the cals and up my protein. I'm a Bally regular and I walk everywhere that I can. I am awesome about it for weeks on end, eschewing drinking and increasing my cardio, doing all the right things. And I can feel little differences, I really can. But then I go to weigh myself or try on the pair of pants that was just a tiny bit too snug, and NOTHING. I think my face looks thinner and my pants are looser, but no, the scale has other ideas and laughs in my face. And then, in my self-pitying state, I will go buy something chocolate as soon as I leave the gym. A tad counterproductive -- I do realize this. And I know this is not a good habit! I don't know where it came from because it didn't happen until recently. But anyway. Another topic, another time.

Point is, my metabolism should NOT be this shot. I'm only 23 (24 in 2 weeks, eep!) so it might not be like when I was 16, but it should not be as slow as it is! I'm sure a little disordered eating in my past has not helped it, but whoa, it's like it's not running at all. Anyway, I've been reading a lot of Jillian Michaels' tidbits on hormonal imbalance (love her, want her arms and her tranny cut abs) and also Dr. Hyman's UltraMetabolism/UltraSimple Diet plans, and they all say our bodies are messed up from the fake crap we put into them.

Soooo... first on the agenda is cutting out the -- you guessed it -- artificial sweetener. In college, I was Queen Splenda and an expert on all things sugarfree. Even though most of those SF products gave me stomach pain and sent me to the bathroom (TMI, yeah sorry), I didn't care because I was skinny. Now, I think I'm finally paying for it. (Either that or Starbucks found out I was stealing Splenda and has decided to conspire against me, slipping full fat cream into my coffee instead of soy. Corporate coffee karma or something like that.) So, while I still may have other not-so-hot-for-me foods in my diet, I'm going to start with this one step and nix the chemically altered sugar subs. It's been almost a week and I'm still going strong...which is hard for me because I was chewing gum like it was my JOB when I was at my actual job. Just sipping on H2O at my desk all day is weird. It feels like something is missing, but I know this is a good thing! Next up, I'm going to cut out sugar for a bit (not fruit though, no way. this ALWAYS backfires on me) and then alcohol. But not this weekend, because come Saturday I plan on having the Corona that is calling my name from the fridge. After this hellish week, it's been practically yelling at me, in fact.

I'll leave you with a few of the scary foods I was eating before:

Splenda, one of the usual suspects. I was putting this on everything save dinner. Unless dinner was oatmeal, then all bets were off.

Not saying these are all bad, and that folks haven't succeeded on the SB Diet, but...to lower the carbs, they had to do a lot of playing around in a lab. I personally do not want to ingest someone's science experiment.

When I was a whiskey-swilling skinny bitch in college, Diet Coke and I used to have a lot of threesomes with Jack (Daniel). I was a wild woman, I tell ya.

Ah yes, my favorite of all the scary shit I've eaten. 50 grams of protein in one shake folks. I'm not sure what I was even going for here. But wait... it gets better....

This is what it looks like mixed up!! I'm pretty sure this color does not occur in nature, and if it does, you shouldn't eat it. This picture doesn't even do it justice either. And believe it or not, this tastes worse than it looks. I pretty much don't have a gag reflex -- nothing makes me ill -- and this almost made me vom right in the work cafeteria. It was 'strawberry' but tasted like salty PeptoBismol. Mmmm.

OK, so, just looking at that last picture reminded me of why I need to clean up my act. Where do you think you can stand to or where would you like to clean up your eating habits?